HOME WITH VIVIEN: WEEK TWO

Week two was a doozey. It started off great with a visit to Aunt Ashley's (Vivien loves Ava) and then Grammie and Papa came over and she was able to warm up to them for the first time. It was great to see her cuddle up with them and show them her very sweet side.

But by Thursday the 27th she was officially sick and it was a rough day for both of us. On top of outsmarting me with her new snack cup and still making a mess with her Cheerios, she coughed seriously about 40 times a minute, and I didn't feel bad for her. I felt bad for me. It was so annoying to me. At about 3:00 she just started screaming and whining and crying and she DID NOT STOP until going to bed at 9:00. I did not have the patience for her nor the reserve of love that I needed to care for her properly. I'm not the most patient nurse. Poor Stella was convinced I was going to send Vivi back to China I was so sick of her screaming at us. I was so thankful when Brent walked in the door with fresh patience and just took her upstairs where she screamed at him. I look back and feel awful for how angry I was at her, but at the time it seemed so overwhelming.

She had a horrible night and I know she didn't sleep much. When I got her up so we could take Stella to school she just flopped down on the floor, first crying and then just laying like a lump. This seemed a bit weird and scary to me so I took her to the doctor. After deciding to go to the doctor I set her down on the stairs where she flopped over backwards because she couldn't even hold herself up. I found her like that and felt a surge of warmth toward her that I hadn't felt before. This little girl needed her mommy and I was that mom. It was a huge step. At the doctor's office we found out that she had a regular virus and we would just have to get through it. When we got home I put on some essential oils that Courtney had brought over and she immediately stopped coughing and was able to take a nice long nap. I was so relieved to see her actually get some rest.

By Sunday we weren't ready to go to church again, but we had some delightful snuggles in my bed. We went on a family walk that night and I was happy to see that we hadn't totally missed all of the spring blooms while we were in China. Then Iva and Steve came over for a visit with Vivi. She was really happy to spend time with her other grandparents.

Each day felt more like normal. Stella was thrilled to be a big sister, but still felt lonely for her old life at the end of the day. However, overall we were all pretty much into Vivien.