BAPTISM DAY

If I'm perfectly honest, I have been dreading the day of Stella's baptism from the moment she was about two weeks old and I realized I couldn't live a life without her. When you have this tiny perfect baby the thought that she will ever be old enough to be baptized is not a pleasant one. Although at the same time, as a mother, you hope that you will raise a child that will wish to be baptized with the same sweet eagerness that Stella did.

The night before the big day I felt quite melancholy. I felt so sad that my baby was making this big step and I honestly don't know where the time went. Even though we did have proof that time had passed in the form of a pretty long video of pictures that we showed before she was confirmed. Speaking of the video, that was a lot of work. It took me forever to go through all of her pictures and pick out the ones that were just right. It took forever for Brent and Stella to record her singing in the basement. It took Brent a long time to get her voice sounding just perfect on the CD. It took sweet Courtney forever to edit the movie for us. But it was great and I think everyone enjoyed watching it.

Stella was extremely nervous in the morning. I had already been up for hours (after not sleeping really) getting the food ready. Stella had her daddy practice with her many times. I'm not sure what she was most worried about, but I am sure the same nervous energy I had that I hadn't felt since the morning Brent and I were sealed was giving her some last minute jitters.

She had to be asked to smile for all the pre-pics because she was so worried. I'm so glad I have the pictures I do have, because being mom and photographer was not an easy thing. I so wish that I had more pictures, especially after the baptism.

 

I took this picture right before the big moment. Can you tell she was freaking out inside? 

 Here is out little angel immediately after she is clean from all of her sins (few as they may be). I thought she was glowing. She was so happy it had gone well. She told me that the water was very warm, almost hot.

 She told me while she was confirmed that she felt warm and happy. I wish I remember more of what Brent said, but I was not really in my head. My mind kept wandering to thoughts of her as a little baby and how much I loved her. Our bishop asked me to speak, and I could barely do it honestly. I remember saying how years ago after trying to have more kids for about three years I told Brent that we may need to accept that we wouldn't have any more. And if that was the case we knew that Heavenly Father sent us the best one they had. I also shared about what an amazing example of Christlike behavior Stella is. She is so quick to forgive and show love to others. She loves with her whole heart. My dad said a few things and then the bishop suddenly closed up the meeting, which Heidi was not happy about because she also wanted to say a few things. I was OK with it really though because I am afraid that if we started talking about how wonderful Stella is we would have never stopped because she is of course perfect. :)

Stella had so many people make such a huge effort to come to her baptism, which is a sign to me of what a wonderful girl and friend she is. The Douglas crew surprised her--they were here looking at houses because they are moving to Utah! The Durhams came all the way from Virginia (I didn't get any pictures of them...so bummed.) All the Gummows were there too of course.

 I made most everyone pose with Stella for pictures before we ate. Stella wanted to take her dress off so fast and eat her lasagna. I was in no hurry for her to take off her dress though...

 I had so much help from Lindsey and I was annoyed that I forgot to get a picture of her and Asher with Stella. She cooked two of the lasagnas even though we didn't need them, (I was sitting in the chapel and was like...uh oh... I made WAY too much food...) made delicious brownies, and bought me some rolls.

It was such an emotional day. I was exhausted. The day wasn't a perfect one, not even close. But it was a special day and I was so moved by how many people took the time to be there by Stella's side. I hope they were able to feel the spirit. I was too emotionally invested in my girl to even notice if I was feeling the spirit or if I was just an emotional mom. I know the video of her growing up with her singing brought in the feelings of love and peace that can come with choosing to live a life that follows the Savior. I am so grateful to have a wonderful daughter who consistently reminds me to be and act like Jesus, and a husband who was worthy to baptize and confirm the most precious thing in our life. She is our daughter, but more importantly she is a daughter of heavenly parents who love her more than I could ever understand.